Are you happy with where you are right now, in this very moment? Do you feel satisfied with your lot in life? Are you on track to realising your life’s ambitions and goals, or are you blundering through your days with little direction and even less motivation?
Most people desire success, whether it’s in their career, financial endeavours or relationships. But not everyone will make the grade. So what separates those who triumph in living their purpose on a daily basis, from those who blunder through, experiencing one apparent failure after the other?
One aspect of success can be attributed to perspective.
Whether we see the things in our world as good, bad or indifferent and believe we assume ultimate control over our own destiny, or have a ‘victim’ mindset and feel the world is against us, will make a massive difference as to how successful you perceive yourself to be.
The truth is…success takes hard work. But not the kind of hard work you might necessarily think. I know many people who toil diligently day in, day out and still don’t feel fulfilled in their lives.
That’s because success is borne from mindset and attitude. No amount of action will achieve success if the right thought process isn’t guiding your journey in the first instance.
More importantly, success is created just as much by the things you don’t do as those things you put all of your effort into.
Here are nine things successful people avoid doing at all costs…
Unrealistic expectations invariably lead to disappointment. When things don’t work out the way you planned or anticipated, it can incite feelings of frustration and inadequacy, as you stress over the little details and beat yourself up for getting something ‘wrong’.
When you view experiences that don’t necessarily go your way from a negative place, you inhibit the potential for self-development.
Stop expecting perfection and start embracing the opportunity to learn and grow from your ‘mistakes’, as well as your victories.
Say yes when they mean no.
Do you create a seemingly impossible mountain of obligations to climb on a daily basis? Perhaps you continually take on the responsibilities of co-workers as the ‘go to’ person in your office?
Human nature means we generally strive to please people and be liked, which of course is a great attribute and will probably see you develop a great friendship circle. But it can also lead to a career as everyone’s favourite ‘doormat’.
Establish personal and professional boundaries based on your own time limitations and priorities, and work within them. Importantly, don’t be afraid to say ‘no’ if an affirmative response makes you feel at all uncomfortable, or uncertain as to whether you can meet your commitments.
Engage in negative self-talk.
Acknowledging those aspects of ourselves that we’d like to improve and work on is important if we hope to achieve success in all we do. But beating yourself up over every little digression is a waste of time and energy, and will inevitably see you end up wallowing in a semi-permanent state of self-induced pity.
Likewise, comparing yourself to others and feeling that you don’t ‘make the grade’ is the fastest way to feeling worthless and losing direction and resolve in your own purpose.
Remember, what others think of you is none of your business. But how you think and feel about yourself will ultimately determine the path you walk and what awaits you at its end.
Live in the past.
Regrets…I’ve had a few. Another aspect of human nature that can quickly become an obstacle to success is the ‘what if’ syndrome. How many times have you thought, ‘If only I’d done it differently?’ or ‘What if I’d bought that investment ten years ago?’
The fact is you cannot change the past, but you can embrace every new moment and make the most of opportunities that present in the here and now.
If you’re too busy looking back at shadows though, it’s unlikely you’ll see the possibility in front of you.
Take it day by day.
When you consider the most successful people in our modern world, I can guarantee the one thing they all have in common is a plan…a strategy to take them all the way to the top.
Living in the moment is of course, a very liberating state. But it’s impossible to achieve success without direction. For a start, how do you even measure the success in your life if you have no purpose?
Fail to set goals.
Some people think that just being present – showing up each day and being ‘good’ to others around them – is enough to attain success. But any level of achievement requires commitment and hard work. More importantly, it requires some degree of foresight and the establishment of clear, meaningful goals.
Think about where you want to be and then put tangible and measurable steps in place to get you there. Otherwise you’ll never even know what success might look like for you and will be striving to achieve a completely undefined and therefore unattainable state.
Isolate themselves from others.
Some people think success is gained by putting your ‘head down and bum up’ and getting stuck in each day. Hard work is admirable, but not at the expense of your personal relationships, because success cannot be achieved without balance in every aspect of your life.
Rather than isolating yourself and consuming every waking hour with work, dedicate time specifically to your loved ones, foster your relationships and incorporate the people who matter most in your personal success.
Compare themselves to others.
The only person you’re in competition with is the person you were yesterday. Successful people are too focused on realising their own goals and mastering their journey to concern themselves with whether someone might be doing better or worse than them.
Drawing comparisons to others will only lead to counterproductive and harmful feelings of doubt and negative self-dialogue. By all means, work on those aspects of your own life that you feel could be improved, but don’t base your own standards on what anyone else is doing or not doing.
Successful people – truly successful people who don’t simply measure success by their bank balance, but their overall life balance – are generally very forthright and generous, with themselves and also with those around them.
They don’t demean or belittle others to get ‘to the top’ and are open to the experience of relationships. But they don’t tolerate fools gladly, nor do they trust blindly or invest their time in people who demonstrate dishonesty or negativity.
For more tips on achieving success in your property investment endeavours, you might also like to read this article.